Here are a few essential elements of every happy relationship. You and your partner might approach them in your own unique way, but if you’ve been feeling like something is “missing” in your relationship, it could be on this list!

In relationship it’s inevitable that we’ll step on each other’s toes and have different needs that conflict.  And it’s likely we’ll want or need different things at the same time.  When this happens, the situation is ripe for conflict, hurt and disappointment. So, when the dust has settled, how do you repair? 

Not everyone is super skilled or comfortable with “real” communication.  Here are five quick questions to help you out.

You’re feeling hopeless about your relationship, but does that mean you’re doomed?  Or is there still hope in spite of that sinking feeling?

Knowing you want help and need help with your relationship is the easy part.  You’re feeling unseen, unappreciated, repeatedly disappointed and pretty damn unsatisfied with him or her.  Now what?

Arguing and conflict that includes criticism, defensiveness and other elements of Dr. John Gottman’s 4 Horsemen of the Apocalypse predict that a marriage will fail about 5 ½ years after the wedding.  So, whether you’re already married, or imagine yourself moving towards marriage with your love-bug, you can’t afford (emotionally or financially!) to let the arguments and disconnection continue.